art, body modification, tattoos

My Tattoos

My tattoos were incredibly important when I got them 15-20 years ago. I love them and have never regretted anything about them.

I think I made good choices that reflect my artistic vision, which is weird because I only dabbled a  little in art at the time and didn’t think I had a vision or style.
My artist who has done all but my very first tattoo which I got when I was 17, influnced me more than  anyone. Mind you, this is about my drawing style, not my painting style.I helped design them and actually drew some of them. All but one are abstract.

 they are still very important but I don’t feel the need to have them showing all the time or talk about them all the time the way I have in the past. Sometimes I dress, not on purpose, and wear my hair down,such that you can’t see any of them. I feel like I have a secret! Also, I wonder if people would treat me differently if they could see them.

People argue about who is the “owner” of the tattoo, or who is responsible for it. Tattoo artists help with the design, or do it entirely. They draw it and ink it on mimeograph paper. They’re making original pen and ink drawings that they color on the skin. If your tattooer is a good artist, you’re not just getting random marks on you’re getting original, custom art. The tattoo artists get paid for their artwork, like any successful artist. spend A LOT of time on anything that’s big or intricate or both. They usually take a picture to put in their portfolio. So, you could argue the artist gets the credit.

 But people who have gotten tattoos say that they helped design or gave picture to the artist. It’s their body, their  blood, their time sitting uncomfortably. I had do a lot of that, sitting on a chair with your body turned so that you can twist your arm backwards. Try sitting like that for hours. For a tattoo I have on my right calf, that goes from the middle of my foot up to my knee, all the way around. i had to stand with my knee bent on a chair seat and the other leg standing with my foot next to the chair.I was leaning on the back of the chair. I was in that position for 4 hours (with short breaks to smoke pot) with blood running down my leg.that might not seem like much to some people and could see remarkable to some. 

Either way, you can see why the person getting the tattoo could see it as *their* tattoo. I think there’s some truth in both.
There was a brief period of time that I was incarcerated. They took everything away from me, but I still had my tattoos. They were my art, clothing that was part of my body. I could run my fingers over them and feeling them slightly, here and there. I could run my eyes over them and tap into a thousand memories.

Some of them look like armor and they all feel like that. I put thousands into paying for them. That was when I was working so it was the sweat of my brow. My husband supports me now (wonderful man that he is), so I don’t feel like any of our household income is 100% mine.

Because I paid for all the tattoos with money I earned, when I was working, it is very important to me, sincebe because of that, they belong to me and me alone.

I love the permanency. Most people are scared of it. I want to stay true to myself. The tattoos force me to be.

abstract, abstractexpressiomism, art, contemporary art, fine art, painting


i wore gloves when i made this, now that i’m getting manicures and am generally trying to do things to make myself look more like an attractive member of society instead of a greasy haired, paint covered, miscreant. lol i did this with alcohol ink which stains the fingers and nails terribly and even the manicurist can’t get it off.

i’m finding that a better way to make alcohol ink paintings is to select a variety of colors i want to use, making sure to choose contrasting cools and some complimentary colors.previously i got out all the colors and pull out what might look good. i make bad decisions and end up putting on way too much ink that way. i get carried away.

i decided i love yellow! it’s so dramatic. it goes with more things than you might expect. you have to be careful not to drown it because a nice clear yellow can make a dull painting fantastic. the only problem is that yellow is so light and it needs a white space for a lot of it to be in so the color shows though on the white paper not blending too much with the other colors. you have to choose yellow to go on the bottom layer of ink so that the white yupo (synthetic paper) underneath shows the yellow bright and clear.

contrast is everything with  alcohol ink, or at least for the way i do it. it’s always moving and blending because i put alcohol blending solution on the paper before i put any ink down. the colors don’t mix as well, and i want them mixing more, a lot more, than they do without using the solution. it’s mainly made for cleaning up messes, like the ones on my fingers (sorta helps), thin the ink to make it flow more or act in even other ways, it helps make the white and metallic colors mix up so they’re not thick and don’t just get grainy or sit in lumps.

i’m quite pleased with this one!


art, artist, music, Uncategorized


When I was a kid, the Police were my favorite band and sting was my true love! Lol! I would have been very surprised to find out that decades later, I think he’s an asshole and I don’t even look out for his albums. I still follow Steward Copeland, who, in retrospect, was the best musician in the band and a really cool guy. Poor Andy Summers sort of fell off the radar, my radar anyway.

Back to sting. I read, and who knows if this is true, that he wore a black and yellow striped sweater which led to the nick name. Since then, even though I became disenchanted with sting, I love black and yellow together. The painting below came from my attraction to the color combination.


The painting is on a 12″x12″ stretched canvas. I used acrylic paint in these colors… Mars black, graphite gray, cadimum yellow deep, yellow ochre, and Naples yellow.

I hope you like it! Comments and constructive criticism are more than welcome!

Who was your favorite band when you were young? If you painted your feelings about them, what would it look like?



inspiration! i found it here on wordpress!

i’m really excited! despite my manic purchase of more watercolor paints than any one person should have, i have been having trouble getting myself to paint over the last couple of weeks.

i usually paint everyday. it’s my outlet for stress and negative emotions. consequently, i’ve been feeling especially depressed today.

for lack of anything better to do, i’ve been cruising around here looking for something that was exciting, not expecting much because i felt so blah. i stumbled upon a couple of abstract painters which led me to other abstract painters, you know how it goes. as i looked through all the wonderful work that i found, much more than i have been able to find before. go figure!

i felt inspired. really inspired!

when i finish up writing this, i’m going to get out all my painting stuff and get to it!

yay for the blogsmosphere! 🙂


regarding the loss of my womb, an abstract painting.

in 2010 i had a radical hysterectomy. i had endometriosis and as a last resort they took out my entire reproductive system. i no longer have any of the problems i had had all my life, which was wonderful.
but i felt that something had been amputated–which is really what happened, if you think about it. i even have phantom period pains.
i had a very hard time coming to terms with this loss. i think i have, but it’s been difficult.

those feelings inspired this painting.

regarding the loss of my womb
regarding the loss of my womb