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morning light

i woke up too early this morning, before 6! i could tell from the light coming in the bedroom doorway that it was early, but not stupid early. (does that sound california? i suspect a lot of what i say does.) i can tell by the color of the light what time it is. it’s not super specific, but i can get a good idea. the earlier it is, the weaker, paler, and more blue the light is. the later it is, the stronger, more bright, and more yellow it is.  today it was thin and washed out, but at least the sun was up! as soon as i woke up, despite the light, i was sure i wanted to get up; who knows why! i often feel like i ought to be in bed or that  i’m “in trouble” for being up so early if i wake up earlier than i think i should be getting up. today that wasn’t the case.

after i come downstairs i drink a lot of fizzy water. it’s almost 8am and i’ve had a liter and a half already! no wonder i have to pee constantly!

fatigue is kicking my ass today. my bra hurts (damn those under wire nightmares) and the tag on my shirt is irritating my neck. all my skin feels really sensitive. i can feel a little bit of my hair  brushing my face and it’s driving me nuts. it makes me feel panicky and angry. i’m listening to Rage Against the Machine because of that.

my pain level is fairly low, although my back was super sore before i sat with the heating pad on it for half an hour or so. now it’s more relaxed.

i hope the rest of the day is better!

i think it will because i’ve eaten (a banana, it was really good) and taken my meds, it’s time for coffee!

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